


Wake Up

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Angst, Episode Tag, Episode: s05e21 Gaza, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-07-23
Updated: 2005-07-23
Packaged: 2019-05-15 20:41:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14797616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: Josh sits by Donna's bedside.





	Wake Up

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

   


 

**Wake Up**

**by: eMetiB**

**Character(s):** Josh  
**Pairing(s):** Josh/Donna  
**Category(s):** Angst, Post-Episode  
**Rating:** CHILD  
**Disclaimer:** They're not mine, and its a good thing, too. That ep was more brilliant than anything I could've ever come up with.  
**Summary:** Josh sits by Donna's bedside.  
**Spoiler:** Gaza  
**Author's Note:** Wrote this around 2 am, so might not make complete sense. But I could NOT sleep. Last night's episode got me all wound up. 

As he sat in the chair next to her hospital bed, watching her desperately for any sign of life, he wondered if this is what it was like for her. Is this the way she felt sitting in GW after Rosslyn, desperately searching him for any sign of life? 

Probably not. The situations were so different. After all, the doctor had been more concerned about his queasiness than Donna's condition. But they had been told not to get their hopes up for him. 

It evened out though, he thought. She hadn't sent him to Rosslyn. 

He'd sent her to Gaza. 

Josh rubbed his face harshly with both hands, overcome with guilt. He felt guilty that he had sent her to that place, that place where she nearly died. He felt guilty for sending there and making her watch other people die. 

He felt guilty that he'd nearly died at Rosslyn-- now that he sees what its like, he felt horrible that she'd ever been through what he's going through now. He felt guilty for loving her, because bad things always seem to happen to the people he loves. 

But most of all, he felt guilty for never *telling her* he loved her. 

He'd thought that maybe, by never admitting his feelings for her to anyone, not even himself, that he could save her. Obviously, it hadn't worked. Now he wanted nothing more than to tell her how he felt. 

He was going to. First chance he got. 

He broke the silence of the room by practicing to her unconscious form. 

"I took two taxis and a plane to get here, so there were no red lights to run," he said, allowing himself, for the first time since CJ had told him about the explosion, to slightly smile. 

He could remember the exact look on Donna's face when she had said that. It had meant a lot to him, hearing her say that, and he cursed himself for never letting her know just how much he appreciated her love. 

"I'm not as wise in the ways as love as you are. I don't know how to do this right, so I'm just going to spit it out. CJ had told me there was an explosion in Gaza, and there had been fatalities. I immediately asked, 'Donna?' but I knew you weren't dead, and I knew you weren't going to die. I just knew, and I repeated it like a mantra until Leo gave me permission to leave. I repeated it to myself the entire way to the airport, throughout the entire flight, and the whole way here. I kept telling myself, 'She won't die, because she can't. She can't die, because I never told her I love her. She can't die without knowing that.'" 

He brushed away the tears that were beginning to fall from his eyes, the first ones he'd allowed to escape since he'd heard the news. 

"Wake up, Donnatella. You need to wake up so I can tell you that."


End file.
